Long Sunday walks with Dad & the children; shorter, regular walks with just the kids; fast-paced walks to Bryn Athyn Post Office to pick up the mail - sometimes twice a day; walks up Alden Road to Soneson's store or further up to the schools; challenging walks up Alden Road, then the Black Path & along South Avenue to Sunday services or weddings or funerals.
After I married John & she moved in with us, she'd walk around our cozy little neighborhood.
As Mom got up there in years, she did fewer calisthenics & more stretches. She took shorter walks - up & down Pheasant Run, then around & around our back yard, then around & around the kitchen island; finally ending up doing foot lifts in the big chair in the living room, the one that Brenda describes as "in the Stickley style."
In place of many of her traditional exercises, Mom substituted breath work. I'd started my own targeted daily regime of three sets of breath work exercises, inspired by Jumpstart Your Metabolism. Honestly, the only reason Mom gave it a whirl was because she was so gosh darned amused at how I sounded doing the HA! breath! Or maybe she just couldn't resist, at her age & "saggy baggy elephant" physical appearance, trying out "Bikini Breath."
Mom hoped
breath work might fill in for some of the strenuous exercises she’d had to give
up as her bones creaked more & her muscles became less flexible. She did not expect it to have an immediate
impact on the low-grade stress & borderline depression that were often part
of her day, something she kept well hidden from the rest of us (who were too
inexperienced in the ways of the elderly to notice).
Little did Mom realize how swiftly &
profoundly even the most basic breath work exercise would increase her sense of
relaxation & sense of well-being!
As the
Gramster reached into her upper 80s & then passed 90, relaxation techniques became a
godsend in her life. Unbeknownst to me
until days later – when Mom would tell all, always in a voice of wonder – she’d
feel herself falling prey to dark moods, to the stress that seems prevalent in
a lot of the elderly. When
she felt the darkness creeping in, she’d sit upright in her chair & do a
couple breath work exercises. It was rare
– very rare – that the darkness didn’t begin to lift immediately.
Mom’s #1
exercise for shaking off the blues was something she called The Sigh – she’d take
a moderate (rather than deep) breath through her nose, then s l o w l y, steadily release it through her
mouth & nose. As she released the
breath, she’d relax her muscles, particularly those in her face, jaw,
shoulders, back & abdomen. Mom
talked about the deep sense of peace this brought on, how her lips & ears
felt especially relaxed, how a sense of well-being seemed to fill her whole
body after just a few “sighs.”
Mom was a
woman transformed! The realization that SHE
could do something to send stress & baseless worry out the door gave her an
awesome sense of unexpected empowerment.
Mom didn’t know
why feeling more relaxed had such an uplifting impact on her sense of
well-being, but there was no arguing with success – it did. She wanted MORE!
The two of us would sit at the computer,
researching relaxation techniques, especially ones well suited for “ancients”
such as herself. She was ready for more,
eager for it.
Mom patted
herself on the back when she read about the importance of regular meals –
hunger is often a doorway to depression, especially with the elderly. Not my mother! She always started her day with a hearty
breakfast, made a substantial lunch & enjoyed whatever I made for dinner, along
with morning, afternoon & evening snacklings - “elevensies,” as she called
them, whatever the time of day.
Simple changes to her exercise routine made a
big change in how Mom felt during & after the sets – out went doing them
at the exact same time every morning, afternoon & evening; in came mixing
up calisthenics & breath work, moving out the tried & true
for something experimental.
She bought a
bright yellow stress ball, which was kept at the ready for her to squeeze
throughout the day – Mom would explain to questioning friends how the simple act exercised her hand
muscles & helped keep her arms limber.
Only the nastiest of weather (or ice) kept her from getting out every day,
even if it was just the short walk to & from the mail box.
Oh, her joy at learning that a couple cups of
caffeine helped boost spirits! (She’d dreaded the possibility coffee might be a depressant.)
If she felt restless, she’d haul out the cross word puzzle that was always
by her side or in her handbag ~or~ she’d write a letter to Kerry or Peggy or
Ellen or one of her many distant family & friends.
Even sweeping the kitchen floor helped relax her, doing it as part of her zen of housework.
I guess we
were both pretty surprised to learn that they ALL helped Mom relax when she’d
tense up or felt down in the dumps. That simple things can reduce, even kick out, stress & depression; that doing them every day helps keep us relaxed, helping keep our spirits up, our sense of balance on even keel, and our sense of personal worth
& happiness in tact, even blooming. Not just olders - ALL of us!
Quite the eye opener. Never thought how feeling relaxed can be a natural antidote for even the
worse blues. Not until I saw its impact on my "ancient" Mom. As she'd say ~ praise the Lord, bless the Lord for the potent power of relaxation!
FYI – it’s important to talk to a doctor before beginning any serious breath work program. Some exercises can be dangerous for people, even if they don’t have serious health issues. Better to be safe than conked out on the floor!
http://goodrelaxation.com/2012/05/top-relaxation-techniques-for-elderly/
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