Makes sense that self-acceptance would follow hot on the heals of self-awareness. But the reality is that the one doesn't always follow the other. For some funky reason, too many of us seem more comfortable tearing ourselves down than building ourselves up.
My older friends seem to have a special problem with this - so many seem to feel it's wrong to see their good points, somehow bad to acknowledge their personal strengths. So many seem infinitely better at seeing their faults than at embracing their special qualities.
How can we youngers help older loved ones strengthen their courage muscle through loving & clear self-acceptance?
Circumstances apparently don't have much impact on how others see themselves. Studies point to the primary factors being psychological, including having:
- A sense of control over their lives
- Room for personal growth
- Core social skills
- Basic generativity (desire & opportunity to create/nurture things that outlast us)
- Goals, no matter what their age
- A sense of being useful
Whether we're family, friends or care partners, we can look for ways to recognize, applaud & nurture these qualities in the aging, aged & elderly. It's not always easy, but it is essential for all of us to step past focusing on imperfections - ain't no such thing as perfection - and doing the best with what we have.
The toughest but most powerful way to encourage older family & friends to practice healthy self-acceptance is by MODELING it in our own lives. Seeing the results of us accepting ourselves as we are in this moment, showing we're constructively self-aware, and living each day to the fullest, will help them see the benefits of moving past their old habit of self-deprecation (or self-deception!) to a new pattern of self-celebration!
- Seize the day!
- Self-awareness
- Self-acceptance
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