The older I get, the more I hear other people's stories about parents & siblings & community cultures, the deeper grows my appreciation of what a lucky lass I was to be born in the family I had, the faith, the community, the country, the time.
Oh, there are plenty of things about each of those that I could dredge up to show just the opposite, to cry Woe is me! & beat my breast with fury over the injustice of it all (whatever "it" is perceived to be at any given time). But the reality is that everyone involved in my life from Day One (Thanks, Doc Andy, for a smooth delivery!) deserves a big juicy THANK YOU! Because every single aspect of every single moment has ended up making me more interested, more curious, more OPEN to every rich ripe experience lesson awareness.
This HUGE light dawned listening to friends talking about their families. Yes, my family seemed to trigger a goodly number of rants & rages, but through it all what was always clear to me was the humanity of each person. They were never one-dimensional to me, even as a child. The credit for that, I believe, deserves to be placed at my parents' door. Can't tell you what they said or did or taught, but am absolutely sure they did. Others drove me batty, but I always saw them as humans doing what they could with what they had. Well, at some deep-down, unacknowledged but definitely there level.
Once we see the humanity in others, it seems natural to respond with caring instead of rebuke, compassion instead of condemnation.
My parents were, it has to be admitted, truly awful at parenting. And they did the best they could with what they had.
My siblings were dreadful at providing the sort of connection & relationship their baby sis always craved. And am sure they did the best they could with the resources at hand.
My little hometown could talk tall without apparently delivering on its promise. And am sure everyone did the best with the resources at hand.
Ditto one & all, individually & within organizations, even the faith I grew up in, which can be the biggest disappointment for anyone.
And my hope of all hopes is that each thinks the same of me, however crazy I might have made or make them.
Let's see each other as besties, not beasties!
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