Interesting thing about the 10 Commandments

Here's an interesting thing about the 10 Commandments to ponder - they instruct people in how to worship their god & lay out the ways to create a civil life.  Some spiritual, some practical - - with a fascinating, rarely discussed commandment smack in the middle transitioning from one to the other.

1. You shall have no other gods before Me.
2. You shall not make idols.
3. You shall not take the name of the LORD your God in vain.
4. Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy.
5. Honor your father and your mother.
6. You shall not murder.
7. You shall not commit adultery.
8. You shall not steal.
9. You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.
10. You shall not covet.

The first four commandments are about how to relate to god.  The last five are about how to relate to each other.  The 5th Commandment is about how to relate to our parents, which a lot of us expand to our elders.  People older & wiser than we are.

Lots of interesting things to ponder looking at those commandments.  They don't talk about any of the hot button issues that the mightily faithful would have us think they do.  Not a peep here, not a peep as Christ later refined them - "Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets."

Yet people spend so much energy & emotion dwelling on "Thou shalt nots" that aren't in the 10 Commandments, weren't singled out by Jesus Christ, and give so so little time to considering that intriguing transitional commandment.  

These are the 10 Commandments, given by God twice to Moses, yet the admonition that is literally the keystone commandment is virtually ignored by priests & laity alike.  How do I know this?  Look around, at how we treat the elderly.  Need I say more?

Here's what I know for sure.  For all my life, the 5th Commandment seemed knitted into my bones.  Even when my parent seemed to lack any sense of loyalty, who agreed with me in theory but with others in practice.  Who came thisclose to driving me bonkers.  

 

Several times, I sought counseling from ministers about the challenge of living with a mother who hadn't a clue about or any inclination to empower her older children, who believed utterly & completely she was supposed to do whatever they wanted, even if contrary to what they needed.  

Each time, each minister advised me to strike out on my own.  They could not understand when I said that was not an option.  

If John hadn't come along when he did...  well, I don't know how I could have continued holding on by myself.  Because I would have kept trying.  Having John by my side, with his own deep devotion to honoring his mother, gave me the boost to stay true to my course, to nurture & live from a 5th Commandment mindset.  To not just stick with Mom & by her, but to HONOR her, which I did to the best of my ability.  

To me, honoring meant treating like a fellow human being with her own hopes & dreams.  It meant being honest & constantly working to build better, healthier relationships with her, with the rest of the family, with myself.  It meant working to create a balance even when things seemed wildly out of whack.  Thinking of love as a verb, rather than simply a noun.  Most of all, it meant just being there for her, for us.

 

It was hard.  HARD.  It meant making a lot of sacrifices.  And it cut both ways - she did her part every bit as much as I did mine.  In some ways, even more.

My mother died several months before I turned 50.  She lived with me for half a century, including time in the womb.  When she died, friends said to me, "Now, you can live YOUR life."  

Actually, I always had.  Spiritual advisors had recommended turning my back on what felt at times like an impossible situation & I had stayed because she was my mother.  I repeat that because it's important.  The choice to stay was mine.  I stayed not because of obligation, but because it was the right thing to do.  Literally.  

Honor thy father & thy mother, that thy days may be long upon the land with the Lord thy God gives you.

Well, I did.  Honored Mom.  Worked, to the best of my ability & understanding, to help make her life as expansive & fulfilled as possible.  And to appreciate that she did her best, too.  We did our bit, as best we could.  

 

Some friends say that they couldn't put their lives on hold, like we did.  I think that John would agree when I say we never considered our lives on hold - they were on HUG.

So, what about that "so your days may be long (prosperous?)" part?

All I can say is, "WOW!"  Almost fifteen years after Mom was reunited with her O! Best Beloved, my days are filled with the fulfillment of my deepest dreams, my most cherished hopes, dreams & hopes fulfilled in ways beyond my best efforts & imagining.  

This posting, a rehash of several earlier ones, was prompted by a call received last night.  A call that so totally put me over the top of joy & wild happiness, it felt truly like a Godsend.  There is no doubt in my mind that always & forever following my sense of a 5th Commandment mindset prepared the way for all that has come.

Imagine if everyone nurtured & followed their own sense of that intriguing 5th Commandment?  If everyone at least took time for a ponder of just what is meant by the 5th Commandment & how it is meant to be lived.  

Imagine if IT was a hot button topic in today's heated discussions.  How different we'd be, as individuals, families, communities, cultures, countries!